okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
They took my balls.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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