awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
