You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
