She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Randomize
