dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
