if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
