The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
