You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Randomize
