she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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