he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Randomize
