You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
