you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
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