Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
