We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
