Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
