I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
