did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
