You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
