4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
