I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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