One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
