Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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