Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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