Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Randomize
