At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
he was CRYING into my vagina
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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