You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
