I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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