Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
