Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
its not stalking. its research.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize