can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Randomize
