Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
