I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize
