she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
