I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
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