mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
