he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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