i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Randomize