Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
