Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
