A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
