Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
