Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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