Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
smell my finger.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
