i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
