what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Randomize
