break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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