Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
