Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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