she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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