if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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